My Life is Amazing and NO MORE "Deflecting" what is meaningful to me!!!

DEFLECT..."Turn aside from straight course; (cause to) deviate (from)... (Oxford dictionary)

Wow, a strategy that I have been using all my life and not realizing that it was "me" that was always doing "it". Jeesh! I have arrived in the full magnificent of who I am and becoming and still giving little bits and parts of me away!!

I know that I am more this body I live in, and have always known that I am "HUGE" in this world. No, not about physical appearance yet more about the "intensity" and the ebb and flow that I enjoy "being" in my world. Huge laughter, quiet moments, enjoying time with other's that I feel great around because they are who they authentically are and becoming, and that allows me to expand deeper into who I am and becoming. These days, right now, I am able to find 'meaningful' experiences with people I love and no longer find time with them only out of "obligation" which I did most of my life. Yeah some people have "disappeared" and other's have come in clearer in my life. I am excited about the many new people that are and appearing on my holodeck. My life is amazing and NO MORE "Deflecting" what is meaningful to me!!!

This is another layer and it was so "invisible" to me almost like it was so "calm" in my body and able to live in my body that always had a pattern that was so "accessible" "automatic button" "so hard wired into the deep structure of my language, permeates in the tissue of each cell of my body... Which choices were I making and make to "deflect" something that was/is so meaningful to me?...oh, so in my body of knowing that yes, being excited and allowing more of this new moment to breathe into...and in that nanosecond I would "deflect" ---not knowing that I was giving away a part of me or even "deflecting"... Not even realizing that in that moment that I was choosing not to expand my life.

Now man, oh man, I am so up for living more and fuller, and my life is "new" to the direction that I want...yet, this "deflecting" is the more that allows me to not have as "HUGE" of potential as I am so up for.

Do I go into my past and make up many stories of why I "deflect"?

NO!!!

I stand right here and just relax into who I am and becoming ---this is information for me to metabolize - either I choose to metabolize or choice not to metabolize...

I just sit here at the computer with "amazement" that I have the choice in each moment to "deflect" or not "deflect"... wonderful that I have allowed myself to even get to the point that I notice now that I "deflect" or not "deflect". This "Deflection" is not good, bad, right or wrong yet when is it useful for me? Do I choose for mySelf first or do I choose to "nurture" everyone else?

Now, I believe "deflection" does work for me when I know I don't want something in my life - very effective...yet, it is in those moments that "I want" "I desire" my life to expand and out comes this strategy..I "deflect" ...and I not knowing what I had just done, or even realizing I had just done something that moves me away from the very thing I can have and is presenting strongly to me...I wonder why my life is not "expanding"...

I have been sneezing right now, this too is a sign of movement in flow...

"DEFLECTING" when am I willing, and when am I not willing to use this strategy? This is what I am going to be curious about and pay attention to for mySelf...

Trust-your-self

Releasing of the Shackles!!! NO MORE....you fill in the blanks.

Today was a great day. I was among the gathering of "WOI" with Louise LeBrun. I don't know where to begin and know that it was HUGELY meaningful to me.

Tonight, I realized that I no longer have "pressure" behind my left eye. I have been experiencing this since the summer. Actually I blog during the summer about it. Today I witness the most incredible "declaration of emancipation" and may I add, have experienced this in my own life when I declared no more "diabetes".

And for me, not to forget the mind games I can play of coming close to wanting "freedom" or certainly knowing that "needing" freedom...movement never lies in the intellect

today this was a very direct and clear "Declaration of Emancipation" - it is done, and this is where I drawn the line in the sand.

I don't know if I actually heard someone say in the room, or in my own mind, that I could hear the "Releasing of the Shackles"!!!

From there I felt this intensity in my body, that truly is never welcomed, and man, it can out!!! Oh I am in a huge bellie laugh right now. Who made up the rules that if you are outrageous that needs to be "tamed"...oh man, that was too much fun today...who said that "life" has to be hard, push that river, do it faster, you'll never measure up to that...today I believe I stand in a different place looking at the Declaration of Evolution by Intention (TM) ; This is fun, exciting and adventurous: I don't have to do serious things, seriously. A suggestion, if this is sparking your attention, to read, Fully Alive Awakening Health, Humor, Compassion and Truth written by Louise LeBrun. www.WEL-Systems.com

Imagine, all I was doing was BEING me, huge movement/energy/flow occured...i need to say this for myself, all because I was "being" me, and tonight I have no more pressure behind my left eye. Go figure!!!

I am grateful for everyone who was in the program room today.

trust yourself - I am looking for some "playmates" that are up for huge fun and joy!!! LOL

"New" Growth

The other day my hair dresser commented on how much "new growth" hair I have. He moved my hair around and it is amazing to me that most of my new growth is around the top and right across the top of my hair line, right in front for me to see. So in my "NEW" world, that to me is about being connected to "other's", "Self" and "Who Else"?

Right now, I am very aware for myself that I am "doing" a lot in my life that requires for me to stay connected at the physical level. My husband started a "new" job this week. I stay present to what is moving in me, with the change that is happening in our home. We just bought a brand "new" 2009 Honda civic. When I was driving the other day, I was putting something in the truck and when I close the truck I stepped back because for me, it read, "BEWS...059" How I read that for myself is, "BE Wise and then, my date of year when I was born". Don't know what that means to me, and I have a knowing in my body that resonates...

I wonder if that is about "who I am" in the world?

Our "new" house will be ready to move in around the 18th of December. At the physical level it is important to me and my husband to pay attention to many things about the house. Lots is "new" and funnily enough, "the end and beginning of something wonderful with our relationship/and to "money"... we are going to be in control of our own "flow of money" through the mortgage we have chosen.

I don't want to be here in front of this computer for much longer. I have an urgency to "move"...

This point in my life, I feel a sense of "freedom" - freedom from choices that I have made, and not someone else making those choices for me...isn't that the way most of us want it, and want other's to do?

This journey has not always been easy, and I know I am onto "new growth"...

To contact me, email at trust-your-self@rogers.com or leave a comment, if you choose...

I hear Louise LeBrun say, "just breathe"...lol

There is "Abundance" for all of us...what matters to me is how much am I willing to "take"?

I am driving a brand new. 2009, RED, Honda Civic!!!!

What I noticed yesterday driving from the east side of Ottawa to the west. Is how I am moving in new "SPACE". What does that mean, finding a "new" way to move through my life. No, the way before up to this point was not good, bad, right or wrong...what this means for me is that I have so much "freedom" in a new car. There are no limits too worrying about if I will make my destination or recently as our only vehicle was breaking down on us, how safe was I feeling to go out my driveway?

I am "free" to go where ever I want to go, and know that everything is okay on my journey.

Wow, what a metaphor for how I am living my life, right now, in this moment..."I am 'free' to go where ever I want to go, and know that everything is okay on my journey".

Yesterday was also a first for me. I asked for "space" that was offered to me at the WEL-Systems Institute. What I did notice as I moved through that 'new' space is how I was taking baby steps of opening the WEL-Systems door, feeling and knowing that I am stepping into "new" space for myself to grow and expand for my own evolution. Instead of, and this has been happening all my life, waiting for other's to step before me...no, for me to be 'safe' in my own body, knowing that all is fine, even in my moments of chaos... and "movement" and "flow" happen now...yes, it has always happened, and I am aware now, of how I want my life to unfold...

As I walked into the office, there was no one to greet me...it was all about me, "taking" my "Space" - something that is vibrating is that there is "abundance" for all of us...what matters to me is how much am I willing to "take"?

I walked towards the program room, and saw the sign from Megan hanging on the door --what is that all about, and it made me feel a sense of "giggle"...

I unlocked the door and felt this sense of "accomplishment" when I opened the door. I sighed and turned on the lights and knew I am in the right place for me right in this moment.

Lots is coming into my life and it is "new". New house, and last night we drove to the new construction. The house will be much smaller then our house in Halifax yet the feeling I am getting is "uplifting". Is it more about "movement" for me, I have "loved" the time I have "invested" with my dog walking; these past two years have been extemelty meaningful for me, walking the streets of Ottawa under the umbrella of the trees...At my "new" home...The view of the nature, pathways, water, and it is all across the street; I feel a sense of "calm" to be surrounded by all of this...and to be in living on a crescent that not much traffic will come into this area in the subdivision...

No longer do I want to be "alone" yet to walk beside women who also want to "take" what is meaningful to each of them...

Tomorrow my husband starts a "new'" job. The contract is for more than 5 years and he has been offered more opportunity and more money. I guess because he is on my 'Holodeck' that I have made a difference in his life...

Life is truly great for me, the next breathe I "take" only expands my life...if it makes sense to you, leave me a comment if you want to, about what was "moving' through you by reading this blog..

trust yourself

Giving mySELF "Space"...

These past several weeks have been moving so fast that I can't believe I haven't blog for over a month. What is coming up for me is that I have been receiving huge metaphors in my life and it is all about giving myself "Space". Giving myself "Space"...

I am very aware that many things that would trigger me before are no longer there. I am coming closer to who I really am, and you no what, I am calm and joyful of re-connecting with mySELF. The SELF I knew so many years ago that I am just "great" "just fine of who I am" "I am the best person to be me". I believe, all of us know the same. Wow, huge rush of fire energy is coming to the right side of my body, in front, near my eye.

It is no coincidence that I received my new eye glasses just this week. It is the beginning of something that I truly and clearly can see, right out in front of me. No, it is not about throwing the "baby out with the bath water"; it has been all meaningful for me. Some of what I am creating is not so good for where I want to envision myself, and yes, I can choose right now, to steer my bus to the direction I want to go towards. And, the experiences I had this summer that I created for myself have shown me that I no longer need to carry that "load" inside myself anymore. I no longer will pay attention to the "collusion" that I believe, women do very well, taught from an early age, and I believe all of us, want to "free" oneSelf from that tangled web. What is coming up for me, is "it is none of my business what other's think of me". "Collusion" in my life is DONE!!!

Lately I have been aware that I have an unquenchable thirst and hunger. No, I am just fine - I think of this differently in my life. I bring this right up to the different choices I am making that will expand my life and have quantum leaps of propelling me into who I really am and becoming. How exciting is that for me?!

This February 2008 at EF:EW (a WEL-Systems intensive course, a huge quantum leap propelled me to a place that I thought would never been possible for me, to be, even in my lifetime - I truly believed that I could never be "freed" of my own stuff that I continued to play the "insanity game": doing the same things over and over again, and expecting different results.
I was being "sucked"into a funnel that was gaining more and more momentum moving faster and faster downward to a "black hole".

Right now, I am so grateful that I "quantum leaped" myself out of that funnel, with my feet secure and stable, and I feel safe in my body. Do I know where my next step will be? No, yet what I am sure about is that it will be "uplifting" for me.

Last night, I created something that has been in the long time planning (I would say that has been a "intellectual" response, and something happened last night and I believe was a "body intelligent response" - actually, over a year I have wanted a "dependable" car. Even though this is awakening me on a physical level it is bringing so much more to me. I know that my "business" will expand because I have no limits of driving now. I will just jump in the car and go now. My husband was just here at the computer and said, "let's go and visit his brother in Montreal for a day". My world is growing bigger.

This has been useful for me to blog today. How I can overtime slowly move away from the "intelligence in my body" to the "intelligence of my brain"...

I guess the thing that comes to mind for me, is that, by giving myself SPACE it allows me to listen to my own SELF. Another thing that is coming up for me, is that it doesn't have to take a lot of time to manifest what I really want for mySELF...

I am looking forward to driving in the fast lane of the 417! Man oh man, I just "giggle" with excitement when I think of myself in a new RED car!

trust yourself