Unquencable Thirst for my Awaken Journey....

In this past month, I have noticed that I have this unquenchable thirst for something more...it is clear to me that that something more is, authentic"Me". Not that me of the past, and that is not right or wrong, good or bad yet me RIGHT NOW and looking up into my emergying FUTURE. Yes, how simple and yet how hard I have made it.

This morning I bloged and you no what, when I saved it, it didn't save. I was at first mad at myself and then quickly went to a place of "surrender'. Not the white light and forgiveness stuff - man, I was too firey to forgive yet to really surrender.

Hmm, there is a difference and I am very aware...let me go to the dictionary and look up the definition of "surrender".... from the Winston Canadian dictionary..."to yield (oneself) to an influence or emotion:-v.i. to yield or give up the struggle:n. the act of yielding to an outside influence: also the giving up of a claim or privilege.

This is interesting for me, and I am in a very different place then even a month ago. I am clear that I have stop looking outside myself for answers, outside "absolute" questions and turned inward to my own truth. Wow, simple yet I made it hard....

Struggle is another word that I have collasped...i had the belief that if I didn't struggle then it wasn't worth pursuing...funny how now, floating down stream with the current is a lot easier then pushing upstream.

There is a simple nursey rhyme song, "Row, row, YOUR boat. GENTLY DOWN the stream. Merrily, Merrily, Merrily, LIFE IS 'Bout A DREAM"!

Right now, I am okay to not continue to blog...it is okay for me to change my mind that I am not wanting to do this right now...all I need to do is breathe deeply into the base of my spine...